(CA22) – In a campaign rally early this morning at Central Valley High School, Congressman Devin Nunes gave an impassioned re-election speech to the rising Senior Class.
“My name is Devin Nunes and I am honored that the Class of 2020 elected me to be their representative as class president,” Nunes proclaimed to the boisterous group of 17-year-olds.
“The Senior Class elected me to make a difference as class president. There is no greater honor than for me to be the voice of the Senior Class, and I’m excited to be running for re-election as a super senior once again.”
The congressman went on to announce his plans to remove campus bike racks for environmentally-conscious students, eliminating first amendment rights of students who don’t like him, as well as announcing his plans to sue the class hamster, who recently bit him.
“I’m Devin Nunes, and I’m going to give Central Valley High the best Spring Fling it has ever had!”